Well, I’m hyper vigilant because I’ve been followed, cornered, threatened, sexually abused (as a small girl), bullied, bullied and shoved into a wall, locked out, robbed, ETC!
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I always try to park next to the grocery cart return or in front of the store so I'm not alone for long.
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S.I.N.G. is my go-to first self defense lesson for my friends. Solar plexus, instep, nose, groin. Solar plexus is great for stunning someone, instep to break the foot, hit up into the bottom of the nose, then hit the groin for good measure. While the assailant is recovering you run and call for help. If someone grabs your wrist, break their grip by jerking towards their thumb. The thumb isn't nearly as strong as most people imagine. If you hit someone in the temples on the side of the head with your palms, you can disorient them. I've seen children do this ...
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I always pull out my earbuds in this situation, too. I also turn and watch them retreat to make sure they don’t double back.
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The old men in my neighborhood in Nowhere’s Ville, Maine, have harassed me repeatedly over the past few years (5 police reports worth). I wear a body cam or have my phone with me at all times when I’m in the garden at the suggestion of the Sheriff’s office
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I text my friends where I am going, including route taking, and estimated time I’ll be home
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I want men as far away as I can get them. They are predators. They do not hear women say no.
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When I’m walking on nature trails, alone, and see a man approaching, I always check to see if anyone else is around before passing the man, and have my phone out ready to call for help if needed.
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I vary my routine in case some creep is watching. I lock everything. I do the smiling, fawning thing if I sense a potential monster. I live with dogs. I don’t really go anywhere besides my small circle. I am always checking for predators, by which I mean male humans.
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I don't use ATMs, ever.
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I ALWAYS lock car doors and my house the minute I come through the door. Even if I’m doing housework, and I’m in and out going to and from the garage, I lock the doors. At night, I go only to places where there are crowds going to/from the venue, or I know people are expecting me. I tend to eat at “family” restaurants where I’m less likely to be acosted by drunks.
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Chew their fucking skin off, chomp on to the face/arms/legs/anything, go full on zombie mode, go for the eyes and work to rip things like lips and ears off
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I don’t walk at night or early in the morning alone. Ever. I don’t go to the gas station at night alone. Ever. I don’t feel safe in my own car with a man tailgating me and I don’t feel safe alerting male police about instances where I’ve been harassed. I don’t allow my kids to play inside peoples’ houses. I don’t allow them to have sleepovers with their friends outside of our home. I do background checks on teachers, coaches, physicians. I don’t post my kids online anymore.
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Drive with my doors locked. Walk through parking lots with my keys sticking thru my fingers. Check the back seat before I get in. Only park in a parking garage if abs necessary. No eye contact w/ strangers. Very careful in elevators and always stand next to the buttons. Never book a single room and always get an extra key "for my husband." If I enter my room alone, I say, Hi honey! like someone's there. I meet meal deliveries in the lobby.
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What about making a post and having to tell them twice not to comment? And they still won’t listen.
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I have lived in a gorgeous wooded area with two rivers in a large city for nearly 15 years. There are beautiful walking trails all around me that I used to walk daily. I came dangerously close to being sexually assaulted twice in broad daylight in 2019 and 2020. I can’t walk the trails comfortably anymore. I am not terrified, but have no sense of safety. I cannot walk on the secondary trails where all of the best wildlife is at all unless I am with a man. I lost my favourite freedom.
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Don't go out after dark alone if I can help it. Let people know where I'm going, when I'm likely to get there. Check in when I reach my destination. Only have one headphone in so I can hear around me. Don't make eye contact with men. Move out of the way for men on pavements. Carry keys in hand as a weapon in quiet car parks. Pretend to be on a call with someone as I walk. Don't take short cuts. Clothes - can I run/defend myself in this? Will I attract unwanted attention?
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I would not walk on a nature trail without pepper spray.
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Pocket knife, mace gel spray, and flame torch. Gun at the front of the house by the door. Leaving from home or heading home awareness of garage door being opened. Walking towards car love my newer car where the door unlocks when the key gets close no more fumbling with keys. Also no more beep to alert someone I’m trying to get in my car. Know how to call ER numbers without opening my phone. Know how to get ER contraception and STI testing. Irish goodbyes.
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Don’t abandon another woman. If she looks uncomfortable, ask. I’ve pretended to know them from college/hometown/whatever. Looked straight at the guy and asked him to introduce himself. It can’t hurt. Worst case you offend a stranger.
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