Pocket knife, mace gel spray, and flame torch. Gun at the front of the house by the door. Leaving from home or heading home awareness of garage door being opened. Walking towards car love my newer car where the door unlocks when the key gets close no more fumbling with keys. Also no more beep to alert someone I’m trying to get in my car. Know how to call ER numbers without opening my phone. Know how to get ER contraception and STI testing. Irish goodbyes.

I always pull out my earbuds in this situation, too. I also turn and watch them retreat to make sure they don’t double back.

Reminding my daughters to be careful every time they go go out for the evening. Not accepting a drink, unless it came directly from the bartender. Of course, a knife under the seat of my car. not walking anywhere isolated after dark by myself, locking doors to the car immediately upon getting in, oh and instinctively checking in the backseat before opening the car.

I have a crucifix necklace. I'm NOT RELIGOUS AT ALL. There is a hidden switchblade in it. 😉🗡️🗡️Smile pretty and watch your back

S.I.N.G. is my go-to first self defense lesson for my friends. Solar plexus, instep, nose, groin. Solar plexus is great for stunning someone, instep to break the foot, hit up into the bottom of the nose, then hit the groin for good measure. While the assailant is recovering you run and call for help. If someone grabs your wrist, break their grip by jerking towards their thumb. The thumb isn't nearly as strong as most people imagine. If you hit someone in the temples on the side of the head with your palms, you can disorient them. I've seen children do this ...

Drive with my doors locked. Walk through parking lots with my keys sticking thru my fingers. Check the back seat before I get in. Only park in a parking garage if abs necessary. No eye contact w/ strangers. Very careful in elevators and always stand next to the buttons. Never book a single room and always get an extra key "for my husband." If I enter my room alone, I say, Hi honey! like someone's there. I meet meal deliveries in the lobby.

I ALWAYS lock car doors and my house the minute I come through the door. Even if I’m doing housework, and I’m in and out going to and from the garage, I lock the doors. At night, I go only to places where there are crowds going to/from the venue, or I know people are expecting me. I tend to eat at “family” restaurants where I’m less likely to be acosted by drunks.

I have lived in a gorgeous wooded area with two rivers in a large city for nearly 15 years. There are beautiful walking trails all around me that I used to walk daily. I came dangerously close to being sexually assaulted twice in broad daylight in 2019 and 2020. I can’t walk the trails comfortably anymore. I am not terrified, but have no sense of safety. I cannot walk on the secondary trails where all of the best wildlife is at all unless I am with a man. I lost my favourite freedom.

The invisible load of being a woman living under the patriarchy

Not so much a daily life thing but I’m a sailor and I don’t own a boat myself so I like to go on sailing trips with folks who own boats. I’m right now sailing in Croatia with a woman skipper and her husband who have the absolute worst relationship dynamic—they bicker constantly—because it’s really hard to vet a male skipper who’s safe. There is a blackist of 300ish male skippers and counting who’ve sexually assaulted or otherwise harmed the women who’ve sailed with them.

I never park next to big white vans…. Never in my life seen a women driving those 🤷‍♀️

When I'm walking to my car and its dark, I keep my keys sticking out between my fingers of my dominant hand in case I need to fight someone off.

Always carry pepper spray. Park closer to doors of place I’m going. Dont park in dark places. If need be have someone accompany me to my car.

I bought my daughters rape whistles, pepper spray and knife rings when they went to college. Gave the entire dorm suites the talk about buddy system. For my son? I told him don’t abuse women, understand enthusiastic consent or I’d neuter him.

I don’t walk at night or early in the morning alone. Ever. I don’t go to the gas station at night alone. Ever. I don’t feel safe in my own car with a man tailgating me and I don’t feel safe alerting male police about instances where I’ve been harassed. I don’t allow my kids to play inside peoples’ houses. I don’t allow them to have sleepovers with their friends outside of our home. I do background checks on teachers, coaches, physicians. I don’t post my kids online anymore.

The old men in my neighborhood in Nowhere’s Ville, Maine, have harassed me repeatedly over the past few years (5 police reports worth). I wear a body cam or have my phone with me at all times when I’m in the garden at the suggestion of the Sheriff’s office

I don’t walk on nature trails alone 😞

I take the train to work. I try to sit next to women. When I get in my car in the parking garage I lock my door. I have a friend that loves throwing parties and has them a lot. Even though I know her and a couple of her tight friends I never go alone. Always bring a guy, husband or a friend if husband can’t come because of work. Most people are ok but you just never know.

Well, I’m hyper vigilant because I’ve been followed, cornered, threatened, sexually abused (as a small girl), bullied, bullied and shoved into a wall, locked out, robbed, ETC!

I would never walk alone on a nature trail.