I text my friends where I am going, including route taking, and estimated time I’ll be home
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Well, I’m hyper vigilant because I’ve been followed, cornered, threatened, sexually abused (as a small girl), bullied, bullied and shoved into a wall, locked out, robbed, ETC!
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I would not walk on a nature trail without pepper spray.
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When I was taking night classes in college my girlfriends and I would take turns driving everyone to their cars. Sometimes I didn’t have that protection either. In those cases I’d call my husband before I left whatever building and I’d have him on speakerphone as I loudly would tell him EXACTLY where I was the entire wall to my car. He knew to hang up and call 911 if I ever screamed or the phone went dead.
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I have lived in a gorgeous wooded area with two rivers in a large city for nearly 15 years. There are beautiful walking trails all around me that I used to walk daily. I came dangerously close to being sexually assaulted twice in broad daylight in 2019 and 2020. I can’t walk the trails comfortably anymore. I am not terrified, but have no sense of safety. I cannot walk on the secondary trails where all of the best wildlife is at all unless I am with a man. I lost my favourite freedom.
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Don't go out after dark alone if I can help it. Let people know where I'm going, when I'm likely to get there. Check in when I reach my destination. Only have one headphone in so I can hear around me. Don't make eye contact with men. Move out of the way for men on pavements. Carry keys in hand as a weapon in quiet car parks. Pretend to be on a call with someone as I walk. Don't take short cuts. Clothes - can I run/defend myself in this? Will I attract unwanted attention?
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I don’t walk on nature trails alone 😞
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I am always looking behind me… Especially at an ATM, in a parking lot, whenever it is dark, at a bus stop… I could keep going. I’m not paranoid, just extremely cautious based on past experiences.
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Reminding my daughters to be careful every time they go go out for the evening. Not accepting a drink, unless it came directly from the bartender. Of course, a knife under the seat of my car. not walking anywhere isolated after dark by myself, locking doors to the car immediately upon getting in, oh and instinctively checking in the backseat before opening the car.
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I always park under a light. My husband didn’t have any idea.
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Not so much a daily life thing but I’m a sailor and I don’t own a boat myself so I like to go on sailing trips with folks who own boats. I’m right now sailing in Croatia with a woman skipper and her husband who have the absolute worst relationship dynamic—they bicker constantly—because it’s really hard to vet a male skipper who’s safe. There is a blackist of 300ish male skippers and counting who’ve sexually assaulted or otherwise harmed the women who’ve sailed with them.
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When I'm walking to my car and its dark, I keep my keys sticking out between my fingers of my dominant hand in case I need to fight someone off.
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S.I.N.G. is my go-to first self defense lesson for my friends. Solar plexus, instep, nose, groin. Solar plexus is great for stunning someone, instep to break the foot, hit up into the bottom of the nose, then hit the groin for good measure. While the assailant is recovering you run and call for help. If someone grabs your wrist, break their grip by jerking towards their thumb. The thumb isn't nearly as strong as most people imagine. If you hit someone in the temples on the side of the head with your palms, you can disorient them. I've seen children do this ...
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I don't use ATMs, ever.
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Sadly, the everyday protection is smiling, nodding, laughing uncomfortably, staying silent, and not dating.We’re taught at a young age to be afraid of being alone. It’s not because of the violent women in the world.Men might be lonely without us. We’re alive and not abused without them. Big difference.
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I once shoved fingers down throat and vomited...he stopped following me (I'd heard doing something strange/repulsive would help)
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I want men as far away as I can get them. They are predators. They do not hear women say no.
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I think the idea of armed military placed in the streets by a known sexual predator is terrifying for women. Women in military conflicts are always victimize while those in power are claiming to protect them. It adds a new layer to our every day fears.
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